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Friday, September 11th, 2009
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Wednesday, March 18th, 2009
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So, I've been thinking about my conundrum for a while now when Patri posted this.
Here is my response, I'd appreciate your feedback as well since this is an area I'm working on:
My conundrum
~One thing it tries to address is resistance to switching perspectives based on what is the truth.~
Over the years I've found myself to be maybe *too* good at switching my perspectives. In many ways this is great, I'm certainly one of the more productive, happy, and satisfied people that I know. So, in many ways I'm very *yay* everything that you posted about...I think I've done a pretty good job of surrounding myself with others who can do these perspective shifts and not get stuck. That said, here is where the difficulty is for me...
I find myself in a conundrum when I work with others, particularly in making decisions/judgments about other people. Because it's relatively easy for me to make these perspective jumps, I can get caught in situations where I'll have an initial reaction to someone (and I don't like to label others because it does box me in to "the truth") and then I'll second guess through these perspective shifts...and then later it pops up again. Though I know that my fault is in maybe giving too many chances to prove my more empowering perspective...so I struggle with what is really so about people, what is my truth therein, and how do I make judgments that keep me honest with myself but open to that people have their own truths as well.
To be more concrete, I offer an example: Over the summer we met a potential teacher for the school. This person seemed really jazzed about us and fully on board in their words. In action however, the person seemed to be lacking. They weren't offering to help out in concrete ways (managing a yard sale or coming to meetings before the school opened).
My "truth" could have been "they're lazy" or "well, they have other work that they are doing right now and I'm so glad that this person is really on board with our mission, this will get better once the school year starts"...and unsurprisingly, "they're lazy" keeps popping back up and I feel rather confused in not having been able to crack down on this harder when I first met the person.
So yeah, that's what I'm working on. What I've come to do more recently is to be more honest with all the truths I can see and talking about them directly with the person...though it is uncomfortable and I would like more clarity/direction at times instead of having no agenda and being a floodgate for everything.
I'd be curious as to how you deal with this if/when it comes up for you.
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Comments: Read 19 or Add Your Own.
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Thursday, January 22nd, 2009
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Anyone up for driving to BIL together? I want to go up on Friday night and come back Sunday night. Furthermore, if you're willing to drive I will make you the baked good of your choosing and pitch in gas money ;)
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Comments: Read 16 or Add Your Own.
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Tuesday, January 13th, 2009
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Just a moment of smiling and also beginning to miss that Desiree and Teresa will not be working at IA for much longer. Des and I just had a fun exchange that would not be kosher with any other staff member...oh well. The fun is and was great ;)
Danielle
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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Tuesday, December 16th, 2008
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Sunday, December 14th, 2008
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So, I was just talking to my friend Aaron and he told me that he was asked to make a mix of music to describe the soundtrack to his life. Pretty neat. I felt fairly overwhelmed at doing that for myself but then thought...hmm wouldn't it be interesting to see what songs other people would pick for me. It would be a neat way to get new music selections and see how others perceive me.
So, what song would you pick for me? And why (if you care to share)?
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Comments: Read 11 or Add Your Own.
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Saturday, November 29th, 2008
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Hello, Thank you for being you and for trying so hard and reaching so far ~ Rob
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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Thursday, November 27th, 2008
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Hello LJ world,
I live in a fantastic neighborhood with a wonderful set up (5 cute little houses all facing each other into a center yard area) and two of the neighbors are moving out at the same time due to life circumstances. I would love to have friends move in! That would be fun and very Odgorm like.
One place is a studio and the other is a one bedroom, I believe they are in the $900/month range.
Benefits include:
Living near me and all my splendidness ;)
Walking distance to lots of shops and eateries
A neighborhood cat who is adorable
Kira the dog who hangs in the court yard who keeps us all safe
A parking space
Washer and dryer for the units
in University Heights near north park and hillcrest
If you want more info, email me.
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Comments: Read 9 or Add Your Own.
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Tuesday, November 25th, 2008
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Oh how I love Pandora and how it sets me with new music to adore. I'm currently wrapped up in Hem's Rabbit Songs album. I would define many of the songs like a really good mocha (luckily I live right down the street from a place that must have at least 20 different mochas to choose from), rich, smooth, and a little bitter.
For a first listen I would recommend "Half Acre" and "Leave Me Here."
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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Friday, November 21st, 2008
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Monday, November 17th, 2008
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"You teach best what you most need to learn." -- Richard David Bach
That quote really resonates with me. I know that for me teaching is an act of exploration...so I get in a lot of practice to those things that I'm guiding others in.
I had an amazing breakthrough with a student last week. I'm sure my writing won't do the story justice but I hope that some of it peeks through. I told the story to my friend Alara while at a coffee shop and she was so touched by the whole thing that she burst into tears. I've never seen her cry in front of me and I've known her for 5 years.
Ok, after twiddling over the keyboard for a while it's not coming out right. All I can say right now is that I got a teenager to see the power of his thoughts and how in being honest with others that he can form relationships and mend bridges that he didn't think possible to repair. After all was said and done, he opened up to his teacher and looked happier than I've ever seen him. I'd describe him as having rainbows coming out of his face...such a glow.
I had this student read a passage that I've been mulling over: Much of what a human being gets out of life, depends on his or her relationship with their mind. We create our own individual reality by the limits we perceive, by our excitement or lack of excitement over new adventures, by the room we make in our lives for quiet reflection...
I know that what I was able to teach to this student during our session was that the mind is so powerful to our every day experience and the relationship that we have with it is constantly growing. I've been looking at my relationship with my mind a lot over the past couple of months and I'll have to post later about what I see.
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Comments: Read 13 or Add Your Own.
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One must still have chaos in oneself to give birth to a dancing star ~ Nietzsche
I just have to say that I adore the swing community here in San Diego. When I first went to a dance here a couple of years ago I was a little put off by the folk, but a lot of that had to do with my own limitations to meeting new people. I'm lucky that I was able to see this limitation and then grow from there.
What I was able to get past was that it would be my actions and attitude that created my time there. When I went the first time, I was by myself and very quiet. I acted like the interactions needed to look a certain way and that I needed to be treated a certain way for me to extend myself to others. It was quite clear that my style wasn't exactly inviting. So, the next time I went many months later, I told myself that I would create a great time for myself no matter what I thought of the other people...and I introduced myself to others, asked guys to dance and magically it was all good. I see that a lot actually, the more I extend myself the better my interactions get.
Yesterday was particularly fun when I wasn't feeling up to dancing due to a headache and I got two text messages from swing friends advising me to come out. Then, when I got there, everyone was just so happy to see me. I felt very connected and loved by my community. Lots of hugs, hellos, conversations, and of course dancing.
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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Sunday, November 16th, 2008
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Five Things I was Doing 10 Years Ago
1. Graduating high school
2. Getting into swing dancing
3. Playing clarinet daily
4. Wondering what my future would hold
5. Beginning college
Five Things on My To Do List Today
1. Write content for Innovationsacademy.org (the website is being redone!)
2. Have lunch with Alara.
3. Meet with Christine and Amelia (school colleagues).
4. Practice piano.
5. Do something that surprises me ;)
Five Snacks I Enjoy
1. Nuts
2. Dark chocolate squares
3. Pretzels
4. Most anything from Trader Joe's
5. Veggies and hummus
Five Things I Would Do If I Were a Millionaire, in no particular order
1. Buy more musical instruments
2. Spend time on creative activities, drawing, painting, etc
3. Donate to my favorite charities
4. Work for free!
5. Go to live concerts all over the world
Five Places I Have Lived
1. University Heights, San Diego (a neighborhood community - I love it!)
2. University Towne Center, San Diego (a corporate community)
3. Jamaica Plain, MA
4. Boston, MA
3. Needham, MA
Five Jobs I Have Had
1. Director of Innovations Academy
2. Sole Proprietor of Heightened Learning
3. Research assistant
4. Psychometrician
5. Tutoring autistic children
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, October 8th, 2008
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The last few days in particular have been very insightful to me. I'll go point by point below:
1. Almost Famous
I watched Almost Famous for the upteenmillionth time last week and I finally figured out why I love it so much. Normally I would just sit back after watching and take in the bliss of the film. But this time it clicked. I love coming of age films. Development of character is so vital for me. And in Almost Famous every single character, young and old, is coming of age and is the better for it. I want my life to be like that, always moving forward, developing. We're all just a "midlevel band struggling with success in the harsh face of stardom."
2. NVC for You and Me
At the school we are practicing the use of Compassionate Communication (aka Non Violent Communication/NVC) and I had a wonderful coaching session last night. I practiced self-empathy and it was really amazing. By being able to give myself empathy it was just as good as if I got it from another person and it made the impact of the emotions that surfaced very real but also very transient. Maybe not transient...but they didn't seem to have a hold on me that was so gripping that it was painful for amounts of time that would be unbearable for me. I sort of have this fear of getting stuck in what I deem to be "bad" emotions...so it was really good for me to experience emotions that are hard for me but not get stuck there and actually feel better afterwards instead of like falling into a tidal wave of upset.
3. Full Responsibility
During my time at the coaching session I spoke to the coach about how I'm having a big shift right now in my perspective on full responsibility. When I was in Landmark (which I stopped participating in, in March) it really up held my belief in taking full responsibility which was extremely gratifying to me since I'm admittedly self righteous about it. Taking on full responsibility definitely had its larger strengths for me and kept me from sinking into "oh woe is me" type moments, particularly in childhood. For me though, not only was the belief upheld but it was strengthened to a degree that I don't think really works and in fact is harmful to myself/others. When I was taking it to this extensive place (oh wow, every single thing in life happens because of me) it didn't leave anyone in my world any room for having their personal power or space. So, I'm practicing letting go in this area...and it's not easy...my mind still plays with this quite a bit.
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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Friday, September 26th, 2008
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Today is a really hard day for me. I could not have imagined it happening but Alex got in his car and started his drive back to Pennsylvania. I don't know where to begin and I don't know where to end...there was just so much stuff that happened. It's hard to separate out what was the relationship and what was circumstances. All I know is that the last 3 - 4 months have been the hardest of my life and I'm so sorry that Alex went through it as well. We both still love each other so much, and maybe some day in the future we are meant to be together...but not now. As usual, the future is wide open and there is both a comfort and a scariness to that space.
I could write about all the regrets I have or what I think I/we could have done differently...but that won't change the now. I still can't even believe that I'm writing this post...it feels like a bad dream, I want to wake up.
What is now is that I am focusing on myself, surrounding myself with friends, and looking to everything that I am grateful for.
What I am grateful for:
Courage
The strength of my being
My friends & family (I am floored by my friends, the support that I have gotten today has been amazing)
Long talks
Chocolate chip, strawberry & banana pancakes
Beautiful plants and my garden
Saying "I love you" when saying "goodbye"
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Comments: Read 16 or Add Your Own.
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A letter I sent today - please spread the word. Sorry no LJ cut, I have bigger fish to fry.
~~~Hello Friends and Family members,
I'm writing to you today with a very specific need for funds for the charter school. Christine and I have been putting our entire lives into this school for close to 2 years now and it appears that we really need your help.
For the last year and half we have been working with the California Charter School Association alongside the Walton Foundation to fund our program. These funds have been noncompetitive in the sense that if we apply for them appropriately, we get the funds. This process has not been easy but we've always stuck with it because it is the closest to a guarantee that we saw. For the last three weeks I've been waiting for their response and have been very proactive. Yesterday, at 8pm, I received a notice from the Walton foundation that we would not be receiving start up funds totaling $250k. As far as we can tell we are the first and only charter school that this has happened to in San Diego. Christine and I are convinced that this has nothing to do with the quality of our application and that's why we are working to get to the bottom of why this has occurred.
In the mean time, we have about 150 students ready to walk in the door and a wonderful staff awaiting us. We have students who are excited again by school, parents who feel relieved that they can go to a school that they believe in and believes in them, and teachers who now have renewed faith in public education. Funding wise, we get paid by the state in late August and then from September onward. We also have another grant in the application phase but that doesn't come through until late September through the state of California.
What does this all mean right now? We have a wonderful program with funding coming in but we have very little to get us started. We have staff, trainings, and materials to purchase in August. I'm certainly willing to wait on my salary but I wouldn't want to ask that of our staff.
Innovations Academy is focused on raising $500,000 between now and August 1. My dad always said, "Ask for what you want, cause you just might get it!" Great advice!
I'm asking you to do 2 things:
- Donate what you can to our cause, $5 or $500 or $5000...it's all a contribution. We are currently incorporated in California and will have non-profit status once the school year starts, it will be retroactive to our incorporation date of June 25, 2007. All donations made today will be tax deductible.
- or send a check made out to Innovations Academy c/o Christine Kuglen, 4050 Mississippi St., San Diego, CA 92104
- Connect with 3 people who can help and have them repeat the process
- One person who values reform in education
- One person who is philanthropic
- One person who you feel believes in our mission and is interested in sponsoring us.
Innovations academy is a place where students and families powerfully create their lives through self-expression, compassionate connection, and purposeful learning. We have developed a program that fully embodies this mission. It is something that is bigger than our whole community put together and the possibilities are endless on what we will be able to accomplish this year. We all have big dreams and I'm asking you to partake in mine in anyway that you can. With much thanks, Danielle & Christine p.s. For more information about Innovations Academy, please see our website. |
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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Dear Box Tops for Education,
I have better things to do with my time than try to get through to a human being for 10+ minutes while attempting to sign up for your program. The endless ads are so aggravating!!!!
~Danielle
*sigh* the life of a school director
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Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
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Saturday, February 9th, 2008
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Hey everyone,
I'm looking for crash space the weekend of February 29 - March 2nd in San Fran. Anyone got a couch or know of someone who does? Unfortunately I'm not available for much hanging out because I'll be there for a seminar that goes all day.
Ping me!
Danielle
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Comments: Read 12 or Add Your Own.
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neurogirl's journal
mellow.
content.
curious.
melancholy.