Danielle Lynne (neurogirl) wrote,
Danielle Lynne

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Inspired by Patri

So, I've been thinking about my conundrum for a while now when Patri posted this.

Here is my response, I'd appreciate your feedback as well since this is an area I'm working on:

My conundrum
~One thing it tries to address is resistance to switching perspectives based on what is the truth.~

Over the years I've found myself to be maybe *too* good at switching my perspectives. In many ways this is great, I'm certainly one of the more productive, happy, and satisfied people that I know. So, in many ways I'm very *yay* everything that you posted about...I think I've done a pretty good job of surrounding myself with others who can do these perspective shifts and not get stuck. That said, here is where the difficulty is for me...

I find myself in a conundrum when I work with others, particularly in making decisions/judgments about other people. Because it's relatively easy for me to make these perspective jumps, I can get caught in situations where I'll have an initial reaction to someone (and I don't like to label others because it does box me in to "the truth") and then I'll second guess through these perspective shifts...and then later it pops up again. Though I know that my fault is in maybe giving too many chances to prove my more empowering perspective...so I struggle with what is really so about people, what is my truth therein, and how do I make judgments that keep me honest with myself but open to that people have their own truths as well.

To be more concrete, I offer an example: Over the summer we met a potential teacher for the school. This person seemed really jazzed about us and fully on board in their words. In action however, the person seemed to be lacking. They weren't offering to help out in concrete ways (managing a yard sale or coming to meetings before the school opened).

My "truth" could have been "they're lazy" or "well, they have other work that they are doing right now and I'm so glad that this person is really on board with our mission, this will get better once the school year starts"...and unsurprisingly, "they're lazy" keeps popping back up and I feel rather confused in not having been able to crack down on this harder when I first met the person.

So yeah, that's what I'm working on. What I've come to do more recently is to be more honest with all the truths I can see and talking about them directly with the person...though it is uncomfortable and I would like more clarity/direction at times instead of having no agenda and being a floodgate for everything.

I'd be curious as to how you deal with this if/when it comes up for you.
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